Rejection – the disappointment of being told NO.

Screenshot_2016-04-11-16-51-04Get any group of children’s ministry directors together and probably the most common struggle you will hear is in the area of recruiting. We will share strategies and ideas, but often we just lament the fact that our biggest source of frustration is being told no when asking people to serve.

I’ll be honest – I used to get borderline depressed when I would ask several people about serving in children’s ministry and would get no after no after no. Who is going to minister to all these kids? I felt so responsible, yet I had no control over other people’s decisions. I would cry out to the Lord, “What am I doing wrong? Why don’t people want to be with the kids? Am I a terrible leader? Am I asking the wrong people?” Then one day the Lord spoke to me so gently and so clearly. He led me to 1 Samuel 8:7 – “Do everything they say to you,” the LORD replied, “for it is me they are rejecting, not you.” “Kathy, my love”, God said, “you just be faithful to me and I will handle the rest. If I direct you to ask someone to join the children’s team and they say no, they are not rejecting you, they are rejecting me.”

Oh, my goodness!!! How liberating that was!!! God’s words to me were a balm to my spirit. I had been taking no very personally, but God was telling me I didn’t need to do that. It wasn’t my problem, it was His, and He would take care of it. After all, He loved this ministry even more than I did!

From that day forward I approached ministry recruiting with a whole new attitude. I didn’t feel so desperate! I would ask God to direct me to whomever he wanted me to ask to join our team. I would ask them to pray about it and then leave it in the Lord’s hands. If they came back with a no, I no longer had bitterness or hurt. I was able to joyfully thank them for considering and move on to the next person.

I will say that one thing I love about Daystar church is our Growth Track process. Growth track allows people to assess their area of giftedness and passion. Almost every month someone decides that children’s ministry is a good fit for them. We are then able to determine where our needs are and how we can help people get acclimated to our team. We are able to train and equip team members easily and keep our teams well-staffed. Since implementing Growth Track, the need to actually recruit for children’s ministry has virtually disappeared. We are constantly being fed new team members, which helps us keep up with the continued growth we see in our children’s area and often begin staffing for growth.  I highly recommend this wonderful process!!

So, the next time you feel the sting of rejection, just remember – it’s not personal, and God’s got this!  And if you are interested in learning more about the Growth track process just shoot me an e-mail –

About theworldaccordingtomrsfarquhar

I am wife to Lee, mom to Andrew, Joel and Ben, mother-in-law to Mary Kate, Allison, and Caroline and Kitty to Leah, Amelia, Anna Carlton and Lacey. I am the Owner of KidMin Care - a support for children's ministry in Raleigh, NC. Oh, and I'm a little bit of a NC State Wolfpack fan. :)
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